Is Jony Ive a Dumb Musician?

I’m lucky enough to have met some really talented musicians. Nobody particularly famous or anything, just the occasional person who is so unbelievably talented they could blow almost any musician in the world off the stage and most certainly hold their own with the rest.

I’ve also met a few visual artists, again mostly quite obscure, who are just mind bending-ly, reality altering-ly gifted.

Bear in mind, I’m talking about people who really are communicating, not just those with empty mechanical ability.

Thing is, on occasion, when you talk to some of these people, you find out they are really fecking dumb.*

Not often mind, just the occasional one, here or there.

It’s always a surprise.

I guess you just expect that someone who can be so fluently expressive in a plastic medium would have something worthwhile to say about dialectical materialism, or ping pong, or whatever.

I’ve never had much truck with the idea of multiple intelligences, although as someone who teaches, I’m at least reasonably familiar with the theory. Now, I’m not saying I had the actual specific following conversation** – it’s a dramatisation for illustrative purposes.

Not Me: “He seems to show promise in the area of kinetic intelligence.” ***

Me: “Feck off. He runs fast. That’s all. That’s the only reason he’s here and the only reason why he won’t be allowed to fail.”

Having said that though, the anecdotal bits seem to stack up in favour of some form of ‘other’ intelligence in the case of the truly gifted dumbos.****

And why not? More fluent in a form or medium you’re comfortable with. No one has any problem with someone being more capable and expressive in written form over their ability to express spontaneously in verbal form.*****

Enter Sir Jony. Brilliant genius of form. Imposing demi-deity of industrial design.

No doubt about that.

At all.

I had such high hopes when he entered the sphere of software in the form of human interface chieftain. After all, he’s do clever, so insightful, so right with everything he designs. However, following all the iLife ‘improvements,’ that came along with Mavericks, I now fear that my hopes have been misplaced.

One example, I’ve never ever had one of his physical objects do the physical equivalent of making me hit the return key 20 times just to insert a freaking page break! +

Dear Sir Jonathan Paul “Jony” Ive, don’t be a dumb musician.

* that’s the politically correct way to say it –  I checked

** was actually about someone who already had their ‘degree’

*** didn’t say Not Me knew what the hell he was talking about

**** I checked – this one’s totally unacceptable

***** so clearly, I’m just a grumpy arse hole overly fond of asterisks – oh the irony

+ I counted (I also realised a row of six asterisks is just silly).

Typed with a little help from this cautionary tale.


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